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     ABOUT ME

    song creator, inspirational writer/speaker, good food cooker, lipstick wearer… a girl from the projects who decided NOT to settle. I'm a believer- in God, in dreams, in love, and in hustle with heart. find out more about me here.

     


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    Monday
    Jul162012

    Do You Have an Exit Plan?

    As you know by now, sharing my story is a vital part of my contribution to the world. 

    I started my career as a speaker when I was in my teens and now I get the pleasure of sharing my story of success despite difficulty to teens on many occasions.

    Most recently, I shared my story to the children of Bright Futures Atlanta.  The children were receptive and had great questions for me afterwards.  What struck me the most is the fact that many of them had detailed exit plans.  Aside from taking advantage of the awesome opportunity that BFATL has become, some of the children shared other plans for getting out of the hood and in to a life that they believe they deserve.

    I wasn’t shocked.  I was only ten years old when I developed my exit the hood plan.  What struck me was the details that some of their plans possessed.  My plan was simple.  I planned to graduate high school, graduate college, and then get a job.  The details of exactly how I was going to fulfill my plans weren’t clear at that time.  I actually filled in the details as I went along.

    We have all had those moments---moments in life when we just want to get far away from where we are.  We want to enter a life that is full of all of the things we love most.  Your life may not be as difficult as my life was or the lives of the children from BFATL.  You may just want more--- more excitement, more joy, more money, more hope, more love, more consistency, and more and more and more...  Well in order to experience that, you are going to have to leave where you are and enter new territory.

    Do you have an exit plan?

    You have been in discussions about the changes you want to make, and the dreams you want to fulfill, but what is your actual plan for exiting your current reality and entering the life that you believe you deserve.

    If you want to finally experience the life you believe you deserve and want to develop an exit plan, here is your approach:

    Get uncomfortable.  You have been in the same place, doing the same things, with the same people---for way too long.  You have been comfortable and now it is time to get uncomfortable.

    Find the exit. If the children of BFATL and I can find a way out of the hood, you most certainly can find your exit. Your exit is your purpose.  Your reason for being here on earth is your built-in exit plan.  Follow that exit.

    Don’t sweat the details.  Don’t let the exactly how hold you back.  You may need to do what I did and fill in the details as you go.  As you move forward you will find that the how will just keep showing up.

    Bright Futures Atlanta is an awesome organization.  They don't just mentor, feed, and offer spiritual guidance to their youth, they provide them with the best possible education and academic support. They want to expand their educational efforts and offer an environment that their students can really thrive in. To find out more about BFATL and ways that you can join their mission, watch this video. You can join their efforts here.

     

    Join the discussion in the comments below!  Do you have an exit plan?  Can you help BFATL with their exit plan? 

    Until next time Loves…when in doubt, simply do what makes sense!

    Thursday
    Jul122012

    Progress, Not Perfection

    Let me tell you about this girl I know.

    She is in her thirties, and that’s all she will tell you about her age. She takes her roles as wife and mother very seriously, but lives for her me time. She is strong because she has to be, and secretly wishes she didn’t have to be.  She has very few friends and no known enemies.  She loves wearing makeup, but hate washing her face most nights.  She takes 100’s of pictures of her self, and deletes 98% of them---because of her one sleepy eye.  She throws frequent temper tantrums and tells everyone she never cries; when in fact, she cries at Hallmark commercials.  She has more than a few pounds to lose and secretly dislikes skinny people who can eat whatever they want and not gain weight.  If you are ever in trouble, she is the person to call.  She is a loyal friend--- who will take care of business---but if you grieve her she will cut you off!  She offers great advice. She loves to read books, but is a horrible speller. She loves to cook, but hates washing dishes.  She goes shopping for herself, but returns with gifts for others.  She is inspired and driven by her faith.  She works tirelessly to achieve harmony.  She desires uncommon success.  She consistently thinks of ways she can help her friends and family.  She has embraced her passion and is motivated by service.  She is an eternal work in progress and is not afraid to admit it.  Today she is comfortable sharing these things with you, but tomorrow she will wish she hadn’t.

    She is…me.

    Don’t judge me.  I’m not perfect.  In fact, none of us are.  We are all works in progress.  Consistency and contradiction can work together to create character.

    I shared some of my contradictions with a client yesterday.  She was having trouble getting over the fact that she can not achieve a fully productive week.  Some days she works well to get things done and other days she just can’t make her way through her list of things to do.

    If your inconsistency is keeping you from moving forward, here is your approach:

    Cut yourself some slack.  News flash!!!! YOU. ARE. NOT. PERFECT. And---you never will be. You are a work in progress--- key word being progress. 

    Keep moving forward.  When you identify inconsistency, combat it with forward action, and identify the things that throw you off track. Eventually, you will find strategies that push you forward and develop a habit of consistency.

    Schedule your success.  Instead of just creating a list of things you need to do, create action steps that are scheduled on a specific day and at a specific time.  This is the best way to stay on track and keep you accountable throughout the day.

    Strive for progress, not perfect ~ unknown, via Making Things Happen.

     

    Join the discussion in the comments below.  What are your moments of contradictions?  Do you feel pressure to be perfect?  What are some of your strategies for being consistent?

     

    Until next time Loves...when in doubt, simply do what makes sense!

    Thursday
    Jul052012

    How to Keep Moving Forward Without Losing Friends {(Revamped)} 

    I received great feedback on my latest NakeiaTV episode and blog about friendship.

    Most adults don’t spend much time talking or thinking about friendship.  We have spouses, children, careers, and all sorts of other things to be concerned about.  In fact, most of the feedback I received was related to ways to make new friends and how to get rid of old friends.

    I shared 3 key points concerning friendship here and today I decided to share a few more. Be sure to visit the original post to get caught up on the first 3 points.

    Set the criteria.  By now you know that I am a fan of systems or a specific way to go about doing something.  After breaking off a 20 year old friendship, I found that there were some things that I absolutely needed in a friend, and some things that I would no longer tolerate.  That is when I set my friend criteria.  There is a new standard that I uphold in my relationships and I maintain them by staying true to those standards.  Set your own criteria.  Create a list of friendship standards that are important to you and uphold them---even with old friends.

    Be a good friend.  I have found that the most effective way to get something is to give it.  If you have genuine people in your corner, they will not hold you to a higher standard than they hold themselves.  Good friends will help you raise the friendship bar.  To determine if you are being a good friend, complete a personal good friend assessment.  Review your friend criteria and put a check next to each standard that you fulfill as a friend. If you answer yes to every standard by which you are judging your friends, pat yourself on the back.  If you could not say yes, I think it’s time to raise your own bar.

    Me and one of my best friends and biggest supporters (my sister) being silly at a photo shoot

    Consider the season.  In the video, told you that some friends are only meant to be in your life for a season or a specific period of time.  When their time is up, don’t be sad---be grateful.  I believe that my 20 year old friendship ended because the seasons in our lives had changed.  Unfortunately, I tried to hang on to that friendship a few seasons to long.  Consider the fact that some friends are placed in your life to add a specific value or the other way around.  Once the value has been added, it may very well be time to move on.

    If you have been struggling in your friendships, and want to be in intentional friendships from this point on, adding the 6 strategic approaches is the perfect start.

     

    Keep the comments coming!!  This time, join the discussion by commenting below.  Many people can benefit from your feedback.

    What new approach will you take in your friendships? Can you consider yourself a good friend?

     

    Until next time Loves…when in doubt, simply do what makes sense!